Home liberachat/#xmonad: Logs Calendar

Logs: liberachat/#xmonad

←Prev  Next→ 184,969 events total
2023-02-24 16:24:01 <liskin> but you're interpreting things in a really really weird way :-(
2023-02-24 16:24:08 <HB[m]> Everyone;'s issues are their own and personal and not comparable to others.
2023-02-24 16:24:19 <HB[m]> You decided to mock me today. This could have been done wioth and moved on.
2023-02-24 16:24:30 <liskin> I don't think I did
2023-02-24 16:24:36 <HB[m]> Not you
2023-02-24 16:24:39 <HB[m]> Sorry geek did
2023-02-24 16:25:05 <HB[m]> He send me mesage, I click join room, and then ugly stuff to read about how I'm faking it and playing soem game and card
2023-02-24 16:25:07 <HB[m]> instead of anything kind or compassionate.
2023-02-24 16:25:25 <HB[m]> "Hey man, ti's h ard, but you'll be okay. I didn't mean anything"
2023-02-24 16:25:32 <liskin> that doesn't sound like him
2023-02-24 16:26:03 <HB[m]> Somethbing like that ... no. Insteadl I get mocked.
2023-02-24 16:26:03 <HB[m]> I'ms orry man
2023-02-24 16:26:03 <HB[m]> I'm sorry I treid to be part of the community and shared something I mad that iothers might find useful
2023-02-24 16:26:03 <HB[m]> I'm not trying to sell anyting
2023-02-24 16:26:09 <HB[m]> I'm not rying to get people to think I'm cool or something
2023-02-24 16:26:23 <HB[m]> I'm just trying to be freindly, man.
2023-02-24 16:26:24 <HB[m]> Please don't hurt me.
2023-02-24 16:26:42 <liskin> would it help if someone else saw what he messaged you and tried to fix the miscommunications?
2023-02-24 16:27:03 <liskin> sending a wall of text to everyone is likely to make more people mad at you, to be honest :-(
2023-02-24 16:27:22 <HB[m]> Yes
2023-02-24 16:27:26 <HB[m]> It's all my fault.
2023-02-24 16:27:39 <liskin> we're not implying that
2023-02-24 16:28:05 <liskin> just that how you're dealing with it isn't very productive
2023-02-24 16:28:17 <HB[m]> Imagine a lifetime, 40 years of constant abuse and put downs by the world.
2023-02-24 16:28:19 <HB[m]> So please excuse me if I don't magiucally trust you after what he said to me
2023-02-24 16:28:39 <liskin> (yeah, I know first hand how hard it is to deal with thins in a productive way when you're angry and/or overwhelmed)
2023-02-24 16:28:40 <HB[m]> I have a difficult time trust peopel after thety hurt me.
2023-02-24 16:28:40 <HB[m]> I am trying very hard.
2023-02-24 16:28:49 <HB[m]> I'm not angry.
2023-02-24 16:28:57 <HB[m]> Anger is definitely not the emotions I feel
2023-02-24 16:29:13 <HB[m]> I feel hurt, sad, rejected, put down, feel alone, lonely, no friends. no support, everyone scolding me.
2023-02-24 16:29:16 <HB[m]> That's how it feels.
2023-02-24 16:29:42 <geekosaur> what I said, for the record, is that I'm at least as autistic as he is
2023-02-24 16:30:03 <HB[m]> I feel liek everything is dark and I'm all alone like a little baby and no one is around and I'm screamign and crying
2023-02-24 16:30:04 <HB[m]> that's how this feels insid emy mind.
2023-02-24 16:30:05 <HB[m]> I'm sorry I have problems
2023-02-24 16:30:05 <HB[m]> Maybe I should just leave and not be here
2023-02-24 16:30:39 <HB[m]> English is not my firstn lanagbue
2023-02-24 16:30:42 <HB[m]> I am not Western or American
2023-02-24 16:30:48 <geekosaur> \it's taken me decades to learn how to manage it well enough to not be a mess online
2023-02-24 16:30:50 <HB[m]> I dont' think the way you do
2023-02-24 16:30:50 <HB[m]> I don't speak the way you do
2023-02-24 16:31:06 <HB[m]> Then perhaps you should have empathy for people like me
2023-02-24 16:31:31 <HB[m]> You clearly see me being severely upset. Then what was the point of saying to me I'm playing some game or cards
2023-02-24 16:31:32 <HB[m]> That implies you thiunk I'm bullshitting
2023-02-24 16:31:35 <HB[m]> Using austism as some excuse
2023-02-24 16:31:38 <HB[m]> or something
2023-02-24 16:31:42 <HB[m]> That's another put down.
2023-02-24 16:31:55 <HB[m]> Do you not see?
2023-02-24 16:32:02 <HB[m]> If you ahve breen through it
2023-02-24 16:32:05 <HB[m]> and our my grandfather's age
2023-02-24 16:32:07 <HB[m]> odler man
2023-02-24 16:32:13 <liskin> I see how that could have been interpreted as that, yeah
2023-02-24 16:32:17 <geekosaur> it has more to do with how you're doing it
2023-02-24 16:32:19 <HB[m]> isn't it your responsibility to ensure your younger brethren sdon't go through it
2023-02-24 16:32:23 <HB[m]> isntead of putting them throughit
2023-02-24 16:32:55 <HB[m]> You as an older man, it's you responsibility to ensure your younger ones don't needlessly suffer what you did.
2023-02-24 16:33:15 <HB[m]> Instead of tough love stuff and inflicting that same thing on them
2023-02-24 16:33:18 <HB[m]> It's not a lesson
2023-02-24 16:33:21 <HB[m]> Toiugh love doens't help us
2023-02-24 16:33:39 <liskin> but do you know what exactly would help you?
2023-02-24 16:33:40 <HB[m]> It hurts us.
2023-02-24 16:33:48 <liskin> apart from undoing the past, which we clearly can't do
2023-02-24 16:33:49 <HB[m]> I understand these things at 42. You're probably least 20+ my senior
2023-02-24 16:33:53 <HB[m]> you ought to know better.
2023-02-24 16:34:20 <HB[m]> I don't want to trouble to anyone
2023-02-24 16:34:26 <HB[m]> I'm feel hjorribl that this is going on
2023-02-24 16:34:46 <HB[m]> I am horribly troubled that because of me this is happenign in here
2023-02-24 16:34:48 <HB[m]> that you have to spend your time and effor ton this
2023-02-24 16:34:49 <HB[m]> I don't liike this
2023-02-24 16:34:51 <HB[m]> I don't like bother people
2023-02-24 16:34:52 <HB[m]> I don't like trouble people
2023-02-24 16:34:54 <HB[m]> I just wanted to help
2023-02-24 16:34:56 <HB[m]> That is all.
2023-02-24 16:35:28 <HB[m]> What would help me? Kindness. Compassion.
2023-02-24 16:35:38 <HB[m]> Explicitly telling me what I need to hear instead of hinting at it
2023-02-24 16:35:45 <liskin> don't worry about that really, we're fine with a little off topic from time to time
2023-02-24 16:35:49 <HB[m]> I need love, kindless, friendship, acceptance, things I have never known.
2023-02-24 16:35:56 <HB[m]> I thought I found that in the only commu8nity here
2023-02-24 16:36:11 <HB[m]> Someone to tel lme you'r enot lying or bullshitting
2023-02-24 16:36:32 <HB[m]> Sorry that life is hard bu tyou'll be okay
2023-02-24 16:36:33 <HB[m]> we accept and love you
2023-02-24 16:36:33 <HB[m]> we're here for you
2023-02-24 16:36:35 <HB[m]> I go no one
2023-02-24 16:36:39 <HB[m]> you have friends an familiies
2023-02-24 16:36:44 <HB[m]> I got no one.
2023-02-24 16:36:48 <HB[m]> I'm literally on the end of my line man.
2023-02-24 16:36:56 <HB[m]> I could give up any moment and just die.
2023-02-24 16:37:08 <liskin> yeah don't give up and die
2023-02-24 16:37:16 <HB[m]> Im crying right now as I tyhpe this
2023-02-24 16:37:16 <liskin> we accept you
2023-02-24 16:39:04 <HB[m]> I'm sorry I feel bad for all this
2023-02-24 16:39:22 <HB[m]> Lose lose for me.
2023-02-24 16:39:26 <liskin> everything's going to be fine
2023-02-24 16:39:29 <liskin> don't worry
2023-02-24 16:39:33 <HB[m]> I willl feel bad about this entire ordeal for days on end. Because myt mental problem wasted your time
2023-02-24 16:39:44 <liskin> not that much of it
2023-02-24 16:39:55 <liskin> shit happens to all of us
2023-02-24 16:40:02 <liskin> we don't hate you for it
2023-02-24 16:40:14 <HB[m]> I don't have any bad feelings for geek

All times are in UTC.