Logs: liberachat/#xmonad
| 2023-02-24 16:24:01 | <liskin> | but you're interpreting things in a really really weird way :-( |
| 2023-02-24 16:24:08 | <HB[m]> | Everyone;'s issues are their own and personal and not comparable to others. |
| 2023-02-24 16:24:19 | <HB[m]> | You decided to mock me today. This could have been done wioth and moved on. |
| 2023-02-24 16:24:30 | <liskin> | I don't think I did |
| 2023-02-24 16:24:36 | <HB[m]> | Not you |
| 2023-02-24 16:24:39 | <HB[m]> | Sorry geek did |
| 2023-02-24 16:25:05 | <HB[m]> | He send me mesage, I click join room, and then ugly stuff to read about how I'm faking it and playing soem game and card |
| 2023-02-24 16:25:07 | <HB[m]> | instead of anything kind or compassionate. |
| 2023-02-24 16:25:25 | <HB[m]> | "Hey man, ti's h ard, but you'll be okay. I didn't mean anything" |
| 2023-02-24 16:25:32 | <liskin> | that doesn't sound like him |
| 2023-02-24 16:26:03 | <HB[m]> | Somethbing like that ... no. Insteadl I get mocked. |
| 2023-02-24 16:26:03 | <HB[m]> | I'ms orry man |
| 2023-02-24 16:26:03 | <HB[m]> | I'm sorry I treid to be part of the community and shared something I mad that iothers might find useful |
| 2023-02-24 16:26:03 | <HB[m]> | I'm not trying to sell anyting |
| 2023-02-24 16:26:09 | <HB[m]> | I'm not rying to get people to think I'm cool or something |
| 2023-02-24 16:26:23 | <HB[m]> | I'm just trying to be freindly, man. |
| 2023-02-24 16:26:24 | <HB[m]> | Please don't hurt me. |
| 2023-02-24 16:26:42 | <liskin> | would it help if someone else saw what he messaged you and tried to fix the miscommunications? |
| 2023-02-24 16:27:03 | <liskin> | sending a wall of text to everyone is likely to make more people mad at you, to be honest :-( |
| 2023-02-24 16:27:22 | <HB[m]> | Yes |
| 2023-02-24 16:27:26 | <HB[m]> | It's all my fault. |
| 2023-02-24 16:27:39 | <liskin> | we're not implying that |
| 2023-02-24 16:28:05 | <liskin> | just that how you're dealing with it isn't very productive |
| 2023-02-24 16:28:17 | <HB[m]> | Imagine a lifetime, 40 years of constant abuse and put downs by the world. |
| 2023-02-24 16:28:19 | <HB[m]> | So please excuse me if I don't magiucally trust you after what he said to me |
| 2023-02-24 16:28:39 | <liskin> | (yeah, I know first hand how hard it is to deal with thins in a productive way when you're angry and/or overwhelmed) |
| 2023-02-24 16:28:40 | <HB[m]> | I have a difficult time trust peopel after thety hurt me. |
| 2023-02-24 16:28:40 | <HB[m]> | I am trying very hard. |
| 2023-02-24 16:28:49 | <HB[m]> | I'm not angry. |
| 2023-02-24 16:28:57 | <HB[m]> | Anger is definitely not the emotions I feel |
| 2023-02-24 16:29:13 | <HB[m]> | I feel hurt, sad, rejected, put down, feel alone, lonely, no friends. no support, everyone scolding me. |
| 2023-02-24 16:29:16 | <HB[m]> | That's how it feels. |
| 2023-02-24 16:29:42 | <geekosaur> | what I said, for the record, is that I'm at least as autistic as he is |
| 2023-02-24 16:30:03 | <HB[m]> | I feel liek everything is dark and I'm all alone like a little baby and no one is around and I'm screamign and crying |
| 2023-02-24 16:30:04 | <HB[m]> | that's how this feels insid emy mind. |
| 2023-02-24 16:30:05 | <HB[m]> | I'm sorry I have problems |
| 2023-02-24 16:30:05 | <HB[m]> | Maybe I should just leave and not be here |
| 2023-02-24 16:30:39 | <HB[m]> | English is not my firstn lanagbue |
| 2023-02-24 16:30:42 | <HB[m]> | I am not Western or American |
| 2023-02-24 16:30:48 | <geekosaur> | \it's taken me decades to learn how to manage it well enough to not be a mess online |
| 2023-02-24 16:30:50 | <HB[m]> | I dont' think the way you do |
| 2023-02-24 16:30:50 | <HB[m]> | I don't speak the way you do |
| 2023-02-24 16:31:06 | <HB[m]> | Then perhaps you should have empathy for people like me |
| 2023-02-24 16:31:31 | <HB[m]> | You clearly see me being severely upset. Then what was the point of saying to me I'm playing some game or cards |
| 2023-02-24 16:31:32 | <HB[m]> | That implies you thiunk I'm bullshitting |
| 2023-02-24 16:31:35 | <HB[m]> | Using austism as some excuse |
| 2023-02-24 16:31:38 | <HB[m]> | or something |
| 2023-02-24 16:31:42 | <HB[m]> | That's another put down. |
| 2023-02-24 16:31:55 | <HB[m]> | Do you not see? |
| 2023-02-24 16:32:02 | <HB[m]> | If you ahve breen through it |
| 2023-02-24 16:32:05 | <HB[m]> | and our my grandfather's age |
| 2023-02-24 16:32:07 | <HB[m]> | odler man |
| 2023-02-24 16:32:13 | <liskin> | I see how that could have been interpreted as that, yeah |
| 2023-02-24 16:32:17 | <geekosaur> | it has more to do with how you're doing it |
| 2023-02-24 16:32:19 | <HB[m]> | isn't it your responsibility to ensure your younger brethren sdon't go through it |
| 2023-02-24 16:32:23 | <HB[m]> | isntead of putting them throughit |
| 2023-02-24 16:32:55 | <HB[m]> | You as an older man, it's you responsibility to ensure your younger ones don't needlessly suffer what you did. |
| 2023-02-24 16:33:15 | <HB[m]> | Instead of tough love stuff and inflicting that same thing on them |
| 2023-02-24 16:33:18 | <HB[m]> | It's not a lesson |
| 2023-02-24 16:33:21 | <HB[m]> | Toiugh love doens't help us |
| 2023-02-24 16:33:39 | <liskin> | but do you know what exactly would help you? |
| 2023-02-24 16:33:40 | <HB[m]> | It hurts us. |
| 2023-02-24 16:33:48 | <liskin> | apart from undoing the past, which we clearly can't do |
| 2023-02-24 16:33:49 | <HB[m]> | I understand these things at 42. You're probably least 20+ my senior |
| 2023-02-24 16:33:53 | <HB[m]> | you ought to know better. |
| 2023-02-24 16:34:20 | <HB[m]> | I don't want to trouble to anyone |
| 2023-02-24 16:34:26 | <HB[m]> | I'm feel hjorribl that this is going on |
| 2023-02-24 16:34:46 | <HB[m]> | I am horribly troubled that because of me this is happenign in here |
| 2023-02-24 16:34:48 | <HB[m]> | that you have to spend your time and effor ton this |
| 2023-02-24 16:34:49 | <HB[m]> | I don't liike this |
| 2023-02-24 16:34:51 | <HB[m]> | I don't like bother people |
| 2023-02-24 16:34:52 | <HB[m]> | I don't like trouble people |
| 2023-02-24 16:34:54 | <HB[m]> | I just wanted to help |
| 2023-02-24 16:34:56 | <HB[m]> | That is all. |
| 2023-02-24 16:35:28 | <HB[m]> | What would help me? Kindness. Compassion. |
| 2023-02-24 16:35:38 | <HB[m]> | Explicitly telling me what I need to hear instead of hinting at it |
| 2023-02-24 16:35:45 | <liskin> | don't worry about that really, we're fine with a little off topic from time to time |
| 2023-02-24 16:35:49 | <HB[m]> | I need love, kindless, friendship, acceptance, things I have never known. |
| 2023-02-24 16:35:56 | <HB[m]> | I thought I found that in the only commu8nity here |
| 2023-02-24 16:36:11 | <HB[m]> | Someone to tel lme you'r enot lying or bullshitting |
| 2023-02-24 16:36:32 | <HB[m]> | Sorry that life is hard bu tyou'll be okay |
| 2023-02-24 16:36:33 | <HB[m]> | we accept and love you |
| 2023-02-24 16:36:33 | <HB[m]> | we're here for you |
| 2023-02-24 16:36:35 | <HB[m]> | I go no one |
| 2023-02-24 16:36:39 | <HB[m]> | you have friends an familiies |
| 2023-02-24 16:36:44 | <HB[m]> | I got no one. |
| 2023-02-24 16:36:48 | <HB[m]> | I'm literally on the end of my line man. |
| 2023-02-24 16:36:56 | <HB[m]> | I could give up any moment and just die. |
| 2023-02-24 16:37:08 | <liskin> | yeah don't give up and die |
| 2023-02-24 16:37:16 | <HB[m]> | Im crying right now as I tyhpe this |
| 2023-02-24 16:37:16 | <liskin> | we accept you |
| 2023-02-24 16:39:04 | <HB[m]> | I'm sorry I feel bad for all this |
| 2023-02-24 16:39:22 | <HB[m]> | Lose lose for me. |
| 2023-02-24 16:39:26 | <liskin> | everything's going to be fine |
| 2023-02-24 16:39:29 | <liskin> | don't worry |
| 2023-02-24 16:39:33 | <HB[m]> | I willl feel bad about this entire ordeal for days on end. Because myt mental problem wasted your time |
| 2023-02-24 16:39:44 | <liskin> | not that much of it |
| 2023-02-24 16:39:55 | <liskin> | shit happens to all of us |
| 2023-02-24 16:40:02 | <liskin> | we don't hate you for it |
| 2023-02-24 16:40:14 | <HB[m]> | I don't have any bad feelings for geek |
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